It’s that time of year again, and the summer holiday break is fast approaching. For separated parents, this can be an especially stressful time and a reminder of the difficulties separation can bring. Worries about finances, trying to organise childcare arrangements and above all the idea of trying to keep your children occupied for 6 weeks can appear daunting and may also lead to disagreements.
Our Family Lawyers have put their knowledge & experience together to create a guide for separated parents over the summer holidays…
Focus on the best interests of your children when making the decisions
Our first tip is to start by focusing on your children, you should always try to put them first and be open and honest when you are talking to them about the situation. Try to avoid being negative about your ex-partner as this may make your children feel they need to ‘take sides’.
Adopting a policy of ‘if you can’t say something nice, then don’t say it’ can really work, as turning against each other will only make the separation more difficult in the long run.
Of course, emotions will be running high, but if you can be amicable towards each other, even though it may hurt, you will spare your children from a lot of heartache. It is important that the children know that you both still care about them and love them. Reassuring them of this will really help them to process and deal with their own emotions.
Be/Stay organised
We would recommend sitting down with your ex-partner and discussing your current arrangements and wishes for the upcoming summer holidays. These include work commitments, plans on going abroad/on holiday, and possible childcare arrangements such as grandparents assisting with childcare, if you both have prior commitments.
Once you have reached an agreement on the arrangements, consider making an electronic diary for you and your children. That way everyone knows how the arrangements will work and the children will know how they will be spending their summer.
Be flexible
Your arrangements are a personal choice based on what works for your family, but it is important to remain flexible, as plans may need to change.
Often, plans changing last minute is a common reason for disputes. How you approach and communicate with your ex-partner is important in this situation. Try to keep your tone neutral and remember to keep your conversation focused on the children and their best interests.
Seek legal advice if you are struggling to come to arrangements/communicate
Speaking to a member of our family law team about separation, divorce or child arrangements can really help, especially if you are struggling to communicate. Having someone who can offer sensible, practical advice can really make a difference and can take the strain out of making arrangements.
At Awdry Law our friendly and experienced Family Law team are here to listen, to support and to advise you.
